I want to add that I know this sounds mean like I’m angry, but it’s kind of more like I’m frustrated with the impossible constraints of the mental exercise.

If I have offended you, I do apologize. It’s not my intent.

I enjoy solving puzzles, but assuming that none of your constraints can bend, then the only thing I can think of would be for you to send out a mailing list begging for money and hope that enough people respond, like a letter saying, “hey, send me a dollar and you’ll get good luck”, or something.

For $20, you should be able to send about 40 letters, and if all 40 of them send you $1, then that would meet your requirements.

If I knew how to do that, I would do it with $10,000 or $100,000 and not $20.

How the fuck are you not gonna interact with people but have cash change hands?

You can’t talk to people. You can’t meet people, but you must somehow get money from other people. The fuck.

You also can’t use banks or credit cards? How the fuck are you gonna meet someone online and get them to mail you $20?

I think if you watch Severance, he does a really good job of changing your perspective, because I had the same feeling going into Severance, and now I feel different.

Same for Brent Spiner as Data.

I have incredibly wild and vivid dreams, a handful of times a year.

My most recent one is one that has repeated a handful of times. I am in Portland for some reason and there is a restaurant with a large gravel lot.

I park and I walk up to the restaurant to order a hot dog and Colin Melloy from the Decemberists shows up. His hair is about shoulder length, he’s wearing cut off blue jean shorts and a plaid shirt. And he puts on an open air concert out in the gravel lot for free for everyone who just happens to be stopping by this particular hot dog stand.

He played songs from the Crane Wife album, which was pretty cool.

I’ve had other dreams where I’ve led choirs of priests and nuns on a musical rampage throughout New York City, singing a song I’ve never heard before and have not heard since as like this massive musical number.

I’ve had dreams where I Fight evil villains on spaceships with laser swords only to find out that the villain was my cousin.

I’ve had dreams where it’s the 80s and I am a white guy that wears white suits and sunglasses and I’m rich and I drive a red sports car that’s a convertible and I have a lot of money and that dream. I told myself, oh yeah, I’ve got to make that big purchase in the morning. I better put $50,000 under my bed so it’ll be there when I wake up. And then I woke up in the real world and immediately looked under my bed to realize that it was a dream and I’ve never been more upset to wake up in my life.

I’ve had dreams where I’m in a dark room being assaulted by demons, being told all the horrible things that there are about me, and I’m trapped to a chair, and like I’m praying to get out of this situation, and the demon laughs at me, and he flicks his finger, and while I’m stuck to the chair, it lifts up onto one leg and starts spinning around and around faster and faster and faster, trying to get my hands to unclass from prayer as the demon laughs in the darkness.

And I’ve had a recurring dream throughout most of my life, well two recurring dreams throughout most of my life, one of which is where I’m standing in an infinitely large black room on a small little pedestal, and there is a glowing, blue, thin strand of string that serves as a tightrope between here and the end of infinity, and i become aware that I am supposed to walk this tightrope.

Somewhere out beyond the darkness are a tribunal of judges who are watching me and watching my performance, as I take one step onto the string, and then I take the second step, and I realize I have to balance, and I immediately fall, and as I’m falling and I’m plummeting through infinite darkness, I hit the ground, and in real life I wake up, and my entire body convulses and bounces on the bed.

The other one that I have is there is a town, and the town has rolling green fields and sunflowers and wooden fences and white houses and paved roads intersecting through it that wind back and forth and I am driving in an old beat up blue Ford truck with the wooden slats on the truck bed. And, as I drive through the town people stop and wave at me and I wave at them because I am making a delivery and they know me and I know them and I get to drive back and forth in this beautiful, serene, peaceful, perfect town full of happiness.

Amazon

I’ve never gone to a website and searched for socks and been shown bicycles before.

In the original script, they would continue to meet up, fall in love, spend time together and then one or the other of them would erase the other person after which the other person would follow and then they would meet and fall in love again and this repeated until they were old and gray

I don’t know if I would call Clerks a slow-paced movie, like the plot barely advances at all throughout the entire movie, and I get that, but the movie is not really about the plot, it’s about a series of seemingly unconnected events that happen in an average, nondescript location in New Jersey, and getting to people watch as the weirdness erupts around the one seemingly normal person in the entire film.

Call JG Wentworth! 877-CASH NOW!

I’ll step up. I was raised in the south by… well, okay by the kind of racist white people that say they are not racist even though they don’t like people of other colors inside of their field of vision.

I am not white myself, and so I got preferential treatment. I was “one of the good ones”.

Plus, as a Native American, I kind of had like this weird, beneficent racism thing where they were like, oh, he can talk to horses, and he can hear it in the trees, and see it in the wind, all of that stupid shit.

Anyway, I didn’t really mind people of color, black people, I would talk to them and be friendly with them because I didn’t have any reason not to be, right?

But sometime around when I was 18 years old, I suddenly realized that I would change my way of speaking when I was around black people. I would say things like, “yo, dog, what’s up?” Instead of, “hey man, how’s it going?”

And I realized now that that is ingratiating behavior. I wanted the other people I was around to feel more comfortable with me, and so I was imitating what I assumed was their speech pattern.

But I also realized that I was pigeonholing them into acting a particular way. I was maintaining the concept that “Black people talk like black people” instead of “people just talk”.

Once I realized I was doing that, I dropped the act and started continuing to be myself when I was around people of different races.

And you know, I made better friends that way. People liked me more and they responded more favorably to me, which to me feels like justification that I made the right decision.

My ex often got frustrated with me because I spend so much time in the planning phase, like learning about things, researching the various options, and making sure that everything is fully prepped and laid out before I start on a project.

Despite all of that, I have yet to have a project go to plan, Except for the one that I came up with off the top of my head.

I was redoing my flooring, and I have like a half third story that’s open, and there’s a lot of exposed transition space between the straight drop-off and the end of the flooring.

It was gonna look really bad to just put L-shaped brackets down to cover over the transition, So, spur of the moment, I realized that I could put a longer flat piece that had a beveled edge on it, and then the L bracket on top of that, and it is probably one of the nicest features in my house.

It is rather banal to be anal about pronunciation like that.

There’s even a saying about it. “I would rather a thousand guilty men go free than one innocent man be murdered”.

Kinda sounds like me when seatbelt laws came out.

At first, I was against them, not because I myself didn’t wear a seatbelt because I did, but because I thought it was absurd that we would waste time and money trying to make stupidity illegal.

Like if you make stupidity illegal, then the people making stupidity illegal would be illegal because it’s stupid to try to make stupidity illegal.

My opinion was that if you are stupid enough to drive a two ton death machine without basic protection and it kills you, then that’s your own stupid fault, right?

But my mind got changed about it when somebody mentioned to me that seatbelts don’t just save lives, they also reduce injuries.

And, given that the kind of person that is dumb enough to drive without a seatbelt is also the kind of person that is dumb enough to drive without insurance, the real reason for pushing for seatbelts was to reduce the taxpayer burden of covering the health care financial deficit caused by these stupid idiots.

It was not a life-saving measure, although it does save lives, but rather, it is a money-saving measure.

Protecting taxpayer money from stupid people is a smart move.

Now I am fully behind seatbelt laws.

I was wrong thinking that having access to information would change the world for the better.

My childish self honestly had no idea that so many people would rebel against their fellow man and common sense rather than learn and accept that they had some wrong information about something.

My hopeful naivety kept me blind to the idea that people are fundamentally stupid, and will fight to the bitter end to die like the dogs they are rather than take one step as a human being that has the tiniest little flaw.

And that includes myself.

And the ease of hiring people who have experience with Microsoft clients compared with the ease of hiring people that can set up an open source version

Yeah. I do cool shit all the time.

Wanna come over and have a fire in the backyard and do a barbecue, drink a few beers, play some games, watch some movies, play some music, record an album, build some shit in the garage, work on cars, write stories, play with electronics, do some computer shit, like, what’s your flavor, pick your poison, I’m down for fucking anything, and if I had another me to do it with, all the fucking better.

There is a chance, albeit somewhat small, that I will finally be able to pay off my student loans in the next six months.

Started at $60,000 and now they’re down to like 14. But I’m expecting a pretty large bonus coming up in the next few months, And if it does come through and no unexpected expenses pop up to take it away, then there’s a chance.

The problem is, is that they basically have everybody on the planet trained to use Microsoft Office.

Because of that, pretty much every company in the world uses it.

So no matter how much they fuck it up, people are going to keep using it because of the difficulty of switching over to an alternative like LibreOffice.

One thing that I hate about it is, if a notification pops up and you are on a different screen or in a different app, when you mouse over the notification to click it to go away, rather than sending the notification away, it sends it to the background and brings outlook to the front.

So you then have to minimize outlook or move it out of the way to get to the notification screen to close the notification screen.

Also it continuously disables extensions because it’s so fucking prioritized on minimizing boot-up time that it does not give a single fuck about how much extra time you have to waste re-enabling the goddamn extensions that you need in order to do your job.

We’re paying good money for these extensions.

We want them.

We don’t care about 1.3 fucking seconds of time it takes for Outlook to start up as long as we have the functionality, and Microsoft’s Outlook keeps disabling them.

If this were a single computer, it would be a hassle. But this is company-wide, having to constantly train and go over how to re-enable the extensions that we need to keep enabled in order for our employees to do their fucking job that we’re paying Microsoft $25 a month per person for.

or how about how Microsoft forces, Microsoft accounts to be created, but won’t allow Microsoft accounts to be created using organization credentials.

But then it goes behind your back and creates a Microsoft account for every single organization credential.

And then it hides that from you inside of Edge so that you first have to remove the organization credential from Edge and then do a search and then remove the organization credential from being inside of Edge just to stop Edge from having an organization credential that it uses to track every single user in your organization and every single thing that they do.

So yeah, fuck Microsoft.