• 4 Posts
  • 236 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 21st, 2023

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  • I’ll give my story which is small but had a huge impact on me.

    On my honeymoon. It’s myself, my wife and a Chinese dude in a suit on our way to Indonesia on the last leg of the flight in the 3 seats.

    We get chatting. Newlyweds, congratulations, yada yada. Back and forth. Lasts a decent amount of time. He laughs because we ask him if he’s Indonesian (we’ve never been there before and Indonesian folks do not look Chinese lol).

    Before he goes he gives us his business card and says we can call him 24/7 if we have any emergencies or difficulties of any kind on our trip. It was such a seemingly insignificant gesture but just took a bunch of hidden pressure off that we hadn’t even thought was there.

    It left a huge impression on me though we never needed it. Ever since I have liberally given my phone number to folks traveling to Ireland (including a nice chap on Lemmy that I nearly met up with). Nobody has ever called me but I would jump in the car on a moments notice if they did.





  • Myself and a friend decided to share a cigarette in the toilets one day. This was fairly common practice way back then. You’d get someone to look out and they would cough if a teacher was coming. It wasn’t flawless but it has a high success rate.

    So we’re utterly destroying one cigarette between the two of us as quickly as we can and there’s a cough followed by loud banging on the door. We’re rumbled.

    “OPEN UP. I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE”

    So we open the door, sheepishly.

    “WHAT WERE YOU BOYS DOING IN THERE?”

    Now we’re both confused and look at each other. I timidly reply:

    “Smoking, sir”

    “WELL I HOPE THAT’S ALL YOU WERE DOING”

    and the man stormed off. We couldn’t believe our luck. Smoking apparently A-OK once you’re not being gay.


  • This is one where the passing of time will really be the only thing that helps. A breakup like that is essentially a grieving process in my experience. When I was younger and still dating I found that trying to lose myself in something (anything) helped after a painful one like this. Movies, games, walks, time with friends, reading - whatever switches your brain off from the grief for a while.

    For what it’s worth, it sounds like you absolutely made the right call. Being with someone that’s not emotionally there for you (and in particular, anyone who is belittling) is very, very wearing and detrimental to both your mental health and self confidence. It can be a tough call, but breaking up is the right one.

    When you’ve had a chance to gather yourself you will hopefully meet someone more suitable who will be emotionally available, empathetic and fight for your relationship.





  • One of the things I remember shocking me in first year computer science was the number of people with zero home computer experience. Like they were raw dogging their college course basically.

    Obviously this was a long time ago when computers were very expensive compared to today (and people here were poorer).