I used to work for one of the big chain pizza joints. On my 21st birthday my boss and a coworker wanted to take me for a beer. They take me to a bar on the edge of town. We are there for about ten minutes when one of our delivery drivers walk-in and orders a drink. We are at the other end of the bar and wait for him to take a drink, then we all say “Hey Bob!”. Bob looks down the bar and says “hey guys what’s up?” We explained why we were there and then asked why he was since he was on the clock. This was before cellphones were in everyone’s pocket and Bob “couldn’t find” his delivery so he had to stop SOMEWHERE for a pay phone, the beer was just a bonus. Bob had worked there for over 20 years and I guess the boss just didn’t care.

Bob also called into work sick one day and when asked what was wrong he said “My dick hurts” and hung up the phone.

I was gonna suggest a little coffee, but yes if your caffeine is contained in a sugary soda it definitely has the potential to rot your teeth.

You know what might help you power through?

Excuse, me, what the fuck!? Galaxy quest managed to be one of the best Star Trek flicks out there while not even being in the same universe. By Grabthar’s Hammer, YOU…SHALL…BE…APOLOGETIC!

Honestly doesn’t sound like a good time, don’t think the ketchup would be enough to save his dick from the chips in her mouth.

An open world TMNT game based on the original 90’s movie. It was dark and gritty and the perfect playground to fight the foot from the shadows.

At one point in the very early 90’s, the Keebler elves stopped making cookies for a few minutes and made the best fucking pizza flavored chips to ever grace this planet. The crafty little shits figured out how to make chips from actual pizza dough, and they called them Pizzerias. It’s been over 30 years and I can still taste them now.

I cannot remember if it had a name, but the world from Brutal Legend. It’s like a heavy metal OZ.

That’s a happy pup right there, good job! Just remember she loves you and hold her every second you can at the vet, keep your head up.

If you haven’t heard, there is a theory that the Frozen movies exist solely to make sure if you google disney frozen or any combination of that you are shown movie stuff instead of stories of Walt Disney being cryogenically frozen so he can live in the future.

In 2016, there were a bunch of creepy/killer clown sightings. At least in America it made the news pretty regularly. My conspiracy theory is that it started purely as Guerilla Marketing for the 2017 IT adaptation.

Bird is the word, fuck that song and on a similar note, fuck Peter Griffin.

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I don’t have an answer on the sweat pants, but just in case you’ve not seen them, these bad boys are a thing. My family has had one in some form for more than 30 years, they are great.

The notion that missing a single guy Ritchie flick is limiting my exposure to the world is laughable. I’m gonna add another 10 years on now.

You could say this if I behaved that way with every recommendation, but it is how something is recommended that is the issue here. Context is key.

Demand avoidance is a thing, I specifically hate it when people are all “BRO, how have you not seen this, it’s the shit. YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOURE MISSING!” So I just stay away as a fuck you I guess.

I won’t watch SNATCH because people wouldn’t shut the fuck about it for like 10 years. It may be great, I wouldn’t know because I won’t watch it.

I don’t quite get this meme, this is what cooking is. We add shit to everything to make it taste better. It’s like saying anyone defending chicken tells me it’s great once I add 17 things to it. Yea you can eat chicken plain but most of us now consider people that do so to be psychopaths when just salt and pepper makes it better, but there are still a ton of other ways to season or accent it with other ingredients.