I have this argument with my wife often. I like to cook, and for me cooking is more than taking frozen meatballs and dumping them into a pan full of jar pasta sauce. I would rather make the sauce, maybe have some meatballs made in advance. My wife seems to think that pre-made stuff or mixes are the way to go. I would rather just make pancakes scratch, which isn’t hard, where she would rather I just open the mix, add water, and make the food. But I do agree that having a frozen lasagna is better than taking the full effort when I just want to get dinner going. So where are your eat the pre-made vs make it from scratch?
Would she be open to use the pre-made mixes as a base and then you improving on them? I love to cook from scratch with nothing but fresh vegetables and base ingredients; it really makes me happy and, if I do say so myself, I do a good job at it (it is indeed a time consuming experience). My mom cooked from scratch and the taste and process of pankakes starting from scratch is familiar and comforting.
I have also learned that there is a lot that I can do by using pre-made ingredients, and that sometimes it’s a huge advantage because I can then focus my cooking creativity on the parts that are less about ‘turning the ladle’ and more about personal time and experience. Some examples:
Pasta sauce: Buy a decent tomato basil sauce. Then add caramelized onions (40 min), mushrooms, artichokes and spices. Now I can focus on what the sauce goes on top of.
Pankakes: Some of the store bought pankake mix is pretty great, I especially love the Ube mix from Trader Joe’s. If you are not making your own mix, then you can really focus on creating some excellent and amazing hme make toppings. It’s a good excuse to perfect a recepie for marmalade or make a perfect mini fried chicken from scratch to go with that pankake.
Mac’n’Cheese: It’s absolutely possible to make Mac’n’Cheese from scratch, but also delicious to start with a box, and then figure out how to max it Gormet in all different ways.
just some ideas.
For all these responses, it’s not just pasta sauce or pancake mixes. And yes, the she does let me doctor things up sometimes. It just gets irritating when I make a sauce, it’s delicious, and then she buys a jar version because “you like this kind of sauce”. I found a great soup recipe I want to try, ask for specific ingredients and she just buys the canned version of the soup. I’ve talked with her before about it when she brought home a cookie mix. I used to make homemade cookies when I was depressed, and it would cheer me up. She suggested I make the mix, all I had to do was add some eggs and water, and we can have the cookies. I had to tell her it wasn’t the cookies that made me feel better.
It sounds like you should be doing the shopping when you want to do the cooking.
Talk to each other, apologize, and compromise. Sometimes do it your way; sometimes do it her way. Understand and forgive each other, enjoy both approaches, and be happy about the situation.